From Gaza with Love

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Inspired by 7ala

Inspired by 7ala's post I wrote this poem, its been for ten years or more when i wrote my last poem.

thank you 7ala, for your post.

hope you like the poem.

Mind Missed on JP

Mind is missed in the Jordanian BlogSphere (JP) for almost two weeks now, the fellow Jordanian blogger Khalidah (The Queen), wrote a post a couple days ago about the surgery she had last Saturday, and as I began to be active in the blogging domain, after the hibernation period my blog was in for more than a year, I began to feel like we are a big family in the Jordan Planet (JP), to be honest with you, I began to feel worried when a citizen in JP, who is now a member of the family to me, disappear or stop writing for a while, I feel that its my duty to check on him/ her as if he/she is one of my family.

Now we have Mind missing from the JP, although she is still in our hearts, when I used to read her blog everyday, I never thought I would visit her blog to find it as it was two weeks ago, and there is fellow blogger Qwaider whose aunt needs prayers from all of us, lets stop now and pray for both that they will get better soon, and if someone would keep us updated, we really want to be by their side.

I'm sorry if I'm talking on behalf of you as I use the "we" pronoun, but I really felt we are a big family and I can use the "we" instead of I.

Blogging is not talking

Many think that blogging is talking; they like talking, and they keep talking, but I think blogging is a responsibility, and not just for having fun, blogging should play a major role as an alternative media, or will lose battle field with traditional media.

Why many bloggers tend to be funny, or just write about funny topics? Or may they are free to do what they like to do, I don't know, may be I don't have the right to criticize any one, but I like to say that blogging is not talking, and one should walk one's talks, and give a good example, all people eyes are on bloggers.

This is just an opinion, I might be right, or wrong, but I like to take blogging seriously, as I have a mission, and I like people to read about it.

Good luck bloggers

They Pretend They Can Quit it

Holding his cigarette, laughing! Do you really think I can't quit smoking? Continued smoking, and laughing, wishing to tell me how much I missed not smoking.

He claimed that he could quit smoking, and other bad habits he is used to, but I don't know why I'm sure he was pretending he could, I don't know why I saw him cheating to himself; he who claims that he can do something should prove that practically, not just claiming.

I lived all my life challenging myself, and I know how hard it becomes when challenging oneself, e.g. doing the opposite thing you usually do, you say u can quit smoking?, ok try it for one week day and night, if you are addicted to something (you won't admit that its addiction), try to stop that for only a week.

I tried it many times in my life, and still try usually to test my patience, and to know how much I still hold control over myself, sometimes I refuse to take a piece of chocolate if I feel that there is a strong voice that urges me to eat it, I refuse until I make sure that this urge dies down.

I challenge all of you to try it, just for fun if you are not convinced of quitting something, I'm sure I'm 100% right this time, that is very difficult and you can't quit it, so please if you can't, admit it to yourself and others, and stop claiming that you are strong and you can change your bad habits in a blink of an eye.

Would you please recemmend my readers a book?

All dear visiters/ bloggers,

At last wiki is on my blog, I could add a page (wiki) that could be edited by anyone, I added my first page,which is created for recommeded readings, can you add yours here please?
click on the following link:
http://proactivity.jot.com/WikiHome

Your help will be appreciated, thank you.

Love is a verb

In his remarkable book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey, writes:

During a seminar, a man came up and said to him –

'Stephen, I like what you are preaching about relationships. But every situation is different. Look at my marriage. I am really worried. My wife and I just don't have the same feeling for each other that we used to have. I guess I just don't love her anymore, and she doesn't love me".
"The feeling is not there anymore?" Stephen enquired.
"That is right", the man affirmed. "And we have three children and we are really concerned about it. What do you suggest"?
"Love her", Stephen Covey advised him.
"I told you the feeling just isn't there"
"Then love her. If the feeling is not there, that is all the more reason to love her.
"But how do you love when you don't love?"
My friend, Covey told him – "Love is a verb. Love – the feeling – is the fruit of love the verb or our loving actions. So love her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her."

I think that I can't add anything more, as Covey made it clear, that we always oversee the "verb" side of things, and we just see the noun, the result of the verbs, as if we expecting the result without trying the verb to get it.

The End of Blogging Age

This is the way everything goes, the birth (the beginning), living itself, then at last comes the death (the end), and blogging is not an exception. I will try to explain why I think that the end of blogging will be soon, or at least people will get less interested in blogging.

Blogging is both reading, and writing, people either read blogs, or write and post to their blogs, and some do both reading and posting, but what makes blogs attractive is the ease of creating a blog, writing and leaving comments, even publishing a blog is now much easier through blog aggregators, such as Jordan Planet (JP), or other websites that offer other services such as blogger, and jeeran, which give all-in-one solution for bloggers, all that convinced people (bloggers) to create and maintain their own blogs, and become bloggers, they do that because there is what I call the personal experience of blogging, they see themselves in their blogs.

I have recently visited many blog websites, or aggregators, and noticed that there are a big number of blogs, than the number of bloggers themselves, then I tried to find out the number of visitors of those blogs and what I found was that less than 10% of the blogs have 85-90% of the number of traffic (number of visitors), and the remaining 90% of the blogs only lives on a little number of visitors, that was shocking.

Bloggers write because they want others to read what they write about, not just for having fun, and if they believe that no one or very few visitors read their posts, many of them will stop writing (blogging) sooner or later, and by time blogs number will shrink, and there will only be those 10% blogs that most of people read, and blogging will be like newspapers, very few number of newspapers, compared to blogs, will leave people with only limited choices to choose from, many bloggers will find soon that they can't keep their blogs running, as nobody is interested in their blogs, they will lose what I called the personal experience of their blogs, and because people in general are not patient, they will give up blogging.

That is why bloggers use tools to know the number of people who visit their blogs, and lately bloggers began posting surveys, to get a real feedback, and in my opinion, some of them want to improve their blogs, that’s why feedback is very important for everyone, and some others want to check if they will stay in business (I mean blogging).

Blogging itself will not end, people will continue reading blogs, and see it as an alternative of typical newspapers or media, but interest in blogging will die and end soon, as blogging will be to them as a source of information not participation, or contribution, people will become readers of blogs, and they might leave their comments on others' blogs, but not bloggers any more, and that is what I mean by the end of blogging, I think blogging bubble will stop get bigger than what its now.

To Immigrate or Not to Immigrate

I always wanted to write about this topic, and I haven't really given it a serious thinking until now. Recently, I have met many who dream to leave the country for another western country, which includes the US, Canada and Australia, some of them took the first step, and the others don't find alternatives but to do the same.

Leaving ones country for another with the intent to stay in the later permanently, or for a long time, whether seeking a better life, or forced to leave his home country because of wars, bad economy, or political reasons, is a kind of immigration.

Faced by this question myself, I find myself looking for an answer for what they call the brain drain, meaning qualified people immigrants leaving their home countries. It became obvious to me that this turns to be a very dangerous phenomenon.

Let me now begin by asking these questions, what if most of the qualified people in Jordan immigrate? Is it the responsibility of those qualified people to stay and make the required change to make our country a better place? Do they have the right just to leave and seek a better life somewhere else, as they are humans, and want to live? Or will they leave for sometime and return back after years? This way they can achieve their dreams, and come back to do what they had to do, I'm not going to answer these questions; they are here to make us think. I even don't know if I can say that immigration is wrong or right, because there are many individuals who have their own reasons for leaving, some of them definitely are convincing which make them right, but when it becomes on the country level, like when most of the youth in this country want to leave, we can be sure that the immigration is absolutely wrong, and bad, and should do something to stop.

One common thing which I found is what made those who want to leave think of immigration as a solution to their problems, they all believe its easier to begin somewhere else in another country than here, most of them think its heaven there ,but not in this country, neither in any other Arab country, opportunities are abundant, and life is easier, some of them even think that they can find money on the streets, and finally I found that most of those people are lazy, and they don't believe that they are part of our communities problems, they just keep complaining, as their problems are their governments' responsibility, even if its their stupidity, or laziness, and see that they has nothing to do with what is going wrong around, they are only victims, the only hope is leaving for heaven, which is any developed country.

What about forgetting a little about living a better life somewhere else, and thinking of living a simpler life here in the meanwhile in order to be able to build a better place here, and sacrifice a little of our lives for the next generations, what makes me say this is that I see that all who immigrate never return back, or at least few of them do, and the remaining will be lost for ever there, and immigration becomes a benefit for the immigrant, but not for his/her home country.

Will it make us proud if we tell our children that we lift our home country to make a better life for them? Or to tell them that we preferred to stick here, and dig our roots deep in our beloved country and live a simpler life, instead of leaving and living much better?

I'm sure that many will get angry at me, and some others will agree, but at the end, I'm just thinking, asking questions, and trying to answer them, one think that I'm sure of is that I love my country, and I want to serve it the best way, even if it means I have to sacrifice some of my precious life, I'm proud of being someone who tries to build something out of nothing, better than harvesting others efforts, and running away from taking responsibility to make our home countries a better place, even if it will cost us our lives.

One of my (Impossibilities)

In a previous post, on my blog, I discussed the idea of having (impossibilities) in our lives, and how we should question those (impossibilities), because they might turn to be (possible), although we think they are impossible, I called us to investigate our paradigms of how we see the impossible in our lives, implying that many of them are not at all (impossible), but in our minds, as we all live slaves by them and to them.

I think it’s a good introduction to begin talking about that, as this post is about mentioning one of my once thought (impossibility), and I think for most of the Jordanians, back in the school when we were still kids we used to keep by heart a poem by Iliya Abu Madi it goes like this:
He said the sky is depressed, then he frowned,
I said, please smile, its enough frowning, and complaining.

قال السماء كئيبة، و تجهما، قلت إبتسم يكفي التجهم في السما

Excuse me for my poor translation, the poem is about a pessimistic person, who sees everything around as depressed as he is, so the poet gives him an advice, to stop frowning, and whining, and to see the bright side of everything, really a great poem, but I think should be read in Arabic, especially if its to be translated by me.

But what has this to do with of the impossible thing I'm going to talk about? Simply because it's about smiling, my mom used to tell people that I don't smile even to a hot loaf, which is an Arabic expression used to describe a person who never smiles, that’s really funny! I really used to wear that frown all the time, I was proud of it, but why do I use the "past tense"? May be I still wear that mask from time to time, and I see it in some others' eyes; want to ask "don't you smile ever?", despite believing in our Prophet Mohammad Peace be upon him: "smiling to others is a charity", it was impossible for me to smile.

Once upon a time, my boss called me; he was in another department, he told me that he needed me, I went there as quickly as I could, when I was there, he told me that one of my female colleagues had a problem with her computer, they were watching me, I fixed the problem on the fly, it didn't take me minutes, then I told him that I did it, and asked if he needed something else, he asked me to wait for a minute before I leave to my sacred department and office, that’s really funny! I stood there waiting for what he was up to, he asked me to look at my female colleague, and asked me "isn't she beautiful?" "Yes! She is" I answered, "doesn't she deserve a minute of your time?" he asked diplomatically, I frowned, then I followed it with another frown, and a third frown, oh God! What was happening to me? How I was thinking? Simply it was one of my (impossibilities), later I knew that he was trying to teach me that a smile is worth more than any thing.

I hear many talk about how Jordanians don't smile, and it's because of the hardships we face, and the hard economic conditions, I believed in that for a long time, but not any more, why because I meet many Egyptians who work in Jordan, who always keep a smile on their faces, and I think that they all have their own hardships, something else here, now I put a smile on my face more often than ever, although its difficult, I think its not a Jordanian problem, in my opinion its attitude problem, its how we see life, and hardships we face, when we frown, its implying that we have problems in our lives, and we can't be happy about, it implies that we will keep whining about them, but at the same time we forget that frowning isn't the solution for our problems, and hardships, the solution has nothing to do with whether we smile or not, so we have to make a paradigm shift, that smiling may help in the relaxation process needed to solve our problems, and frowning doesn’t bring any benefit.

So the first step I took to solve this problem was two to three years ago, that I kept a piece of paper in my pocket, and I used to read it every morning, there was written on it a line which read "smile, please smile, even if u don't want to smile" and as soon as I read that line I order the muscles on my face to smile, and that’s how I began to meet people with a smile on my face.

But later, may be one year ago, I began another way, which is to change my attitude and try to look at things differently, from another perspective, may be more optimistic, the problem with this way is that the new attitude is not yet rooted in, so sometimes I get to what I used to be, I'm working on this once thought (impossible), it was (impossible) only in my mind, no where else.

So do you have your own (impossibilities)? And do you still think that they are (impossible)? Please try to do something, try to check them; they might turn to be something of the past, change your attitude toward things.

Bloggers I need help (against…)

Wasta, what a word! Has no equivalent word in any other language, English, French, or Chinese, I told my American friend about it, it was the first time he heard of it, then I tried to explain its meaning to him, he was trying hard to figure what it really was, like it was came from an alien from the outer space, there was a strange expression on his face.

Wasta is our Jordan flavor for doing things, without it nothing works, it’s a form of ways to get a permission, or to be able to do things ,which without u can't do, in some countries they use bribes, in others power, the power of money, etc., but in Jordan we are more civilized! We just use Wasta, even the sound of this word is nice, and it keeps resonating like a soft music, wasta, ta ta ta.

But what does Wasta mean? For those who doesn't know Arabic, or may be non-Jordanian, we should define the word so it would be clear for them how much we are lucky to have such a word, this great word means that a person has to know someone else with high ranks, or authority, to be able to have a job, or do things, e.g. to be able to have a job in x company, u should know someone to call a manager in that company to help you get the job, even if you are unqualified, so its great to have a Wasta, isn't it?!!!!

Many argue that Wasta became a reality, and we have to accept it as a way of living, and have our Wasta to be able to get a good job, ok let us take that logic aside, and think of some other way to deal with this great phenomenon, lets accept that it’s a reality, and sometimes may be we can't do things without Wasta, but on the other hand do we do anything to change that reality? I don't think so, most of us accept it and say its impossible to change, one of the Jordanian impossibilities, I believe we can do something against it.

Some people think that Wasta is a she, and others think it’s a he, and I think it’s a shehe, the benefits of it works for both females and males, so it has no gender, we can neither say Miss /Mrs. Wasta, nor Mr. Wasta, but why do we care if she is or he is? We should be proud we have it.

Others say Wasta exists in other counties; it's not a Jordanian mark, what is that logic, which justifies it? Do we have to accept this bitter-sweet reality, or try to do something? I'm one who will try to do something, even if its considered to others nothing, I would be happy with this nothing, instead of standing and watching.

I tried to contact some of my friends who are graphic designers, and asked them to make a banner or logo against Wasta, so bloggers could easily use it, and put it on their blogs, declaring that we are not happy with this thing, but as those designers are lazy, and didn't believe in the idea, I really need help regarding making the banner, or whatsoever called, to publish and send it to bloggers, to be the first to do something against it.

Would any one help me in this task? Let's do something, bloggers I need your help.

Killed his Three Daughters (True Story)

He woke them up early in the morning, hurry up we have a lot of work today, he told them, the three of them wanted to sleep more, one of them told her sisters that she was dreaming of her wedding day, and that it would be soon, they laughed, when their father interrupted them, come on we have work to do.

It was still dark, the sun was beginning to rise shyly, the father was the first, walking quickly, he usually walked slowly, the youngest daughter asked him, father why are you in a hurry today? He didn't answer, until they reached their farm, he told them that they have to dig a big hole to be used as a well, one of them told him that they had one, the father replied that the well would be only used for special events.

They all worked from sun rise, to sun set, for several days, 7 meters deep, their father was happy with them, he told them that many times, his daughters were happy too, it was the first time he asked them a hand.

The day of the party finally came, they couldn't wait more, they finished the work, and now it was celebrating time, the father told them he wanted to hug them, and kiss them, he did it, quickly he stabbed his first daughter in the back, the second, then the third as quickly as he could, cold-bloodedly, he looked at them, his daughter who was first killed had still a smile on her face, the smile was declaring their innocence, he wiped his knife, and threatened his son to tell anyone of his crime.

This crime took place in Irbid, twelve years ago, Jordanian Daily newspaper Al Rai reported.